Happy Juneteenth!

Juneteenth is finally here and I am excited!

My level of love for Juneteenth is equivalent of that of that when syrup first met pancakes.

If you do not know what Juneteenth is you should first be ashamed. Be very ashamed.

When you are done being ashamed you can gain the knowledge of Juneteenth. Juneteenth is defined as “a festival held annually on the nineteenth of June by African Americans (especially in the southern states), to commemorate emancipation from slavery in Texas on that day in 1865.”. What this fancy definition fails to say is that it is also one of those holidays. By that I mean those holidays in which everybody and their mama stops by unannounced to grab a plate of food, gossip, or both!

“Gurrrrrl guess what I heard!”

This random group of people can include a distant cousin, an older “auntie” who expects you to remember her babysitting you when you were two years old, and your current crush.

You just never know who you are going to see on Juneteenth. It’s like hearing a knock at your door on Purge night.

It could be a friendly, terrified potential victim.

Or a group of mass murderers.

You just never know what you gonna get, life is like a box of chocolates, right?

So I’m guessing you want to look good when your future husband walks in the door.

Or former babysitter/ Auntie.

In an effort to look presentable to elders but still sexy to the future hubby I recommend a maxi dress!

Maxi dresses are the perfect outfit to appease everyone. They are long, loose, and modest so they are good for the elder. Then when you turn around….

As the famous philosopher Aubrey Drake Graham once said “I hate it when she go, but I love to watch her leave.”.

To find the perfect maxi dress to wear to your Juneteenth celebration that will not break the bank I recommend buying one from the thrift store!

One that I love is this cute and light weight hi-low black maxi dress.

The ruffles on the hemline add just the right amount of movement. The light weight fabric allows you to be cool while socializing at your Juneteenth celebration. I initially found this dress at a department store for $273.00!

Thankfully Thredup had it for only $33.50.

My next recommendation is this cute and sexy white sundress from shopgoodwill.com. Originally from White House Black Market, the price of this piece originally was a lot higher than the $15.00 price tag found at goodwill!

The affordable dress is fashioned using a lightweight tulle fabric and affixed with a bow. Few can deny that bows are cute, however the bow is used to hide a belt that cinches in the waist and gives you the perfect hourglass shape.

But even the dresses above are gone you can always put on pants and go buy the perfect dress to wear on Juneteenth at a physical thrift store!

or don’t…

Good luck and Happy Juneteenth!

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Decorate your bedroom for Halloween!

The greatest element of any holiday is the feeling it invokes in you.  On Christmas it is a feeling of warmth and joy, Thanksgiving it’s the feeling of gratitude and abundance, and on Halloween it’s eeriness and the impending feeling of doom.

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The feeling of being scared is addictive.  Proof of this can be found in the popularity of Stephen King books, American Horror Story, scary movies, f***boys who you give your heart to, love, new things, ok sorry I went off there…

Ok that aside, feelings associated with holidays are often brung on with decorations.  Case in point can be the popularity of a christmas tree or the necessity for candles on a birthday cake,  These little items remind us subconscioulsy that the item is special and invokes a feeling within us.  The feeling of fear is a personal one which we don’t allow others to see in many situations.  When we do allow ourselves to be truly scared it is akin to being naked, we allow vulnerability and freeness.  The main location where we are naked is our bedroom.  Well, for most people its the bedroom, clothes are uncomfortable so when home alone its probably everywhere actually…

So one thing is unquestionable, that we tend to spend the majority of our time in the bedroom, naked or clothed.

(Theres only two places a woman belongs, the kitchen and the bedroom, Florida!  Kitchen and the bedroom!!)

So why not make it a space that promotes vulnerability by invoking a sense of fear in yourself while simultaneously paying homage to the great holiday of Halloween?  Decorating your bedroom for Halloween is easy and the thrift store makes decorating cheap!

When Heckorating (halloween+decorating, clever, right?) you first want to focus on making your bed look adequately festive.

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The most important element of most bedrooms is the bed.  It’s where we do two of the bodies most needed activities.

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😉

We spend the majority of our time in the bed.  The bed is so important to many that no expense is spared in ensuring its comfortability and aesthetic appeal.  Aesthetically it represents the room.  Therefore, when heckorating your bedroom for Halloween you want to be sure to heckerize your bed.

Changing your pillow covers and adding accessories such as a Halloween blanket or a few Halloween decorative pillows go a long way in ensuring the wickedness of your bedroom.

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Your next step in heckerization is to hang up some elegant photo frames with black and white portraits of random people.  I don’t know why black and white portraits are creepy, they just are.

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You can print out random portraits online and then hang them in an ornate picture frame from the thrift store.  You can affix it to your wall using a command hook.

Your next step is to add random spooky knick-knacks to your bedroom, such as skulls or mannequin parts, or dolls (dolls are another thing that are creepy for some reason).

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But be careful to not add too many knick-knacks or else you’ll look like a hoarder.

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Next a Halloween tree is essential.  A Halloween tree is basically a Christmas tree without the tree or the jolly ornaments. Basically you find a branch, stick it in a pot with dirt then decorate it with Halloween themed ornaments or Halloween themed garlands.  You can use a mannequin limb instead of a branch, whichever works best for you.  If you MUST use a tree make sure it’s skinny with no curves, a Kylie Jenner before her surgeries looking tree.  That brings me to my next tip, make sure the tree is not aesthetically pleasing either.

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You can find printable Halloween ornaments and garlands here.  Underneath your tree place presents {candy, spider rings, that “porn” from the ‘20s of women in lingerie, etc.) wrapped in orange or black paper.

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Next we focus on setting the mood by setting up some white candles (white candles are another thing that are creepy for some reason.  Or sexy. White candles are either really creepy or really sexy.  There’s no in between).  In order to burn them safely I suggest using an elegant looking saucer from the thrift store.  Nothing is creepier than a white candle on a nice plate.

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Finally, the symbol of Halloween is the jack-o-lantern!  To make your heckoration complete you must have one!  But because it will go inside your room and roaches and fruit flies don’t really go with the theme (or do they?) we will pass on carving them. Instead you can mimic carving by drawing designs with a sharpie onto the pumpkin; and be unique and creative! Make your faux jack-o-lantern match your theme.

Or opt for a non-pumpkin option.

Share your favorite ways to heckorate!

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