Be intimate during the summer

Turn off the lights, and light a candle…

Maybe don’t light a candle…

Summer is not as romantic as one would think. It’s hot, sticky, and full of mosquitos.

To top it all of kids are out of school and bored, so to entertain themselves they come eat up all your food and bother you. Even when they’re not yours.

Many of us actually dislike summer and romanticize it only in the winter when we’re freezing our butts off.

It’s hard to be intimate when you are more concerned with not melting or getting malaria than you are with “sexy time”, but millions of people around the world do it and according to Askmen.com there are a variety of benefits to receive by doing it.

Askmen.com reports that ” The act of cuddling releases a hormone called oxytocin, sometimes called the ‘cuddling hormone.’ Oxytocin is responsible for provoking what scientists refer to as ‘pair bonding’, which means it makes the cuddling couple feel closer and more intimate”.

So, basically if you cuddle with your man he won’t cheat on you.

…Not really 100% sure about that, I mean a leaopard doesn’t change it’s spots. A cheater is going to cheat on you no matter what you do or how you look.

But back to the topic. Intimacy doesn’t have to cease to exist just because it is hot outside. Some tried and true methods to intimacy in the summer are as follows:

Taking room temperature showers together

A tried and true “sexy time” location, few can dispute the showers’ dual ability to get you clean and satisfied at the same time.

But did you know that if you just turn down the water heat (and close your eyes and use your imagination) you have a romantic waterfall cascading onto you and your lover?

Getting a “pool full of liquor and dive in”

When I was in undergrad my friends did this and I couldn’t go because I was busy.

They made sure to tell me about it in detail and make me regret not going. They also made sure to throw in that my crush went! To think that I missed the opportunity to pretend I was drunk and confess my love to him and have him positively respond and then we’d be happily ever after and I would have like six kids by now took me out!

(If he’s reading this mwen renmen ou, I’m waiting for you bae!)

I’lll always be waiting

But despite the fact that I have yet to experience it in person, I still think that it is a great way to beat the heat while also cuddling up to a special someone.

Good old fashioned water balloon fight

Disclaimer: You may not want to partake in this option if you wear wigs and glue them down with Got2bglue. One wrong move and your wig can go flying. Yes, your man know that’s not your hair. But let him pretend for a few minutes before you put your scarf back on.

This a fun way to be intimately completive while staying cool and burning some calories! Motivate one another by making a fun prize like the loser has to be the winners slave for 12 hours.

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Camming while on your period

In my last camgirl post I stated that in the next camgirl post I would explore the signs of horniness within males; but as Wendy Williams notoriously says “a woman is allowed to change her mind” and after doing hours of pointless research, I have. The signs of horniness in males did not offer a very vast or interesting list. Basically, if a guy smiles at you, he’s horny…just kidding!

kinda….

The topic of this post will be focused on periods! Most women have them, and they are here to stay. Just like another thing that is also here to stay and equally as troublesome: BILLS!

So even when Aunt Flow is visiting and you feel like trading in your webcam for a gallon of cookie dough ice cream and Netflix you cannot. You cannot because the rent is due every month and its not going to pay itself.

So you may feel like a cow but in order to put food on the table you must be a sexy cow.

Here’s how.

Periods.

Medical News Today describes a period as follows “A woman has two ovaries, each of which contains a number of eggs. Every month during the reproductive years an egg will be released. Also, every month, the womb prepares a lining in case the egg should become fertilized. If the egg does not become fertilized, the lining is not needed and, together with the egg, it will be shed. We see this shedding as blood. This is what we call a period”.

Medical News Today as well as numerous other sources maintain that the frequency and duration of periods vary based on a variety of other factors but one is guaranteed to experience at least one. This statement makes periods seem like a serial killer of sorts.

Medical News Today lists the following symptoms as being symptoms associated with periods:

  • abdominal bloating
  • acne
  • headache, including migraine
  • irritability
  • pains, especially backache
  • low mood
  • feeling generally emotional or troubled
  • insomnia
  • lack of concentration
  • breast tenderness or swelling
  • slight weight gain
  • binge eating

I experience pretty much all of them (ESPECIALLY irritability and low mood, I will ban you for calling me cute and then cry when five minutes go by and no one tips. I am the poster child for emotionality during that time of the month.)

The best way I have found to deal with your period while camming is to be honest about it. The persons viewing cams are not in the sixth grade (hopefully) and probably wont be totally disgusted when you divulge that you are unable to do something due to being on your period. However, chances are they will be disgusted if you move the tampon to the side and proceed.

I deal with bloating by donning a cute one piece lingerie. I also make sure that a bunch of snacks are nearby to satiate the need for junk food accompanying periods. In regards to both pain and emotional volatility I recommend offering a private show with the ability for members to purchase a ticket. Give them like two hours or so to buy a ticket and then just do stuff for those who actually pay, not the freeloaders. Freeloaders just really grind my gears when I’m on my period and if I expend 1 ounce of energy and they don’t tip

So I eliminate the outward expression of irritability by only offering my time and energy to paying customers.

I would LOVE to hear your tips for keeping it sexy when Aunt Flow comes around! Please leave them in the comment section below.

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No-sew DIY lingerie

Before I begin I would like to sincerely apologize for randomly dissapearing for a month.   I’ve experienced ghosting before and therefore know how annoying and hurtful that can be.  I went ghost due to a lack of organization on my behalf due to the incorporation of two other obligations into my schedule.  Now that I have finally figured out how to balance them with creolethrifting.com I will resume weekly uploads on this platform every Wednesday!  So now without further ado let’s get to the article!

So you know those “cheap” diys for pretty items?  The instructions claim the materials only cost like ten dollars but then the items needed to actually do it cost like 50 and are difficult to find.

1tape

I’m talking to you double sided tape!

The final straw is when the tutorial says that it will only take fifteen minutes but it ends up taking five hours and you end up with this:

2diyfail

So in this realistic DIY that is not the case.  It actually costs 5 dollars and requires the use of regular household items that the typical person has.

The end result is a beautiful bow-like lingerie piece:

bow

Do not fret if your first go looks a bit closer to this

8CB2DE74-2E51-4192-930E-185FF72A2C9A

I actually like this more, its giving me:

“Yeah ah ha, you know what it is
Everything I do, I do it big
Yeah ah ha, screaming that’s stuff
When I pulled out of the lot, that’s stuff
Step up in my town when you see me you know everything
Black and yellow, black and yellow
Black and yellow, black and yellow”

kid dancing

Point is you’re (maybe) not a seamstress and may need to finagle your creation or use some tape.  However you choose to do it I’m sure it will turn out great.

Bow Lingerie DIY

Materials

4 hoop earrings

1 pair of scissors

1 bundle of 5 inch wide ribbon (I found mine at my Goodwill)

1 bundle of gift wrap paper for measuring, unless you have actual measuring tape, that works, too, I guess

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Step 1: Using your gift wrap measure your torso; do this by holding the gift wrap vertically starting at your waist and then marking on the white part of the paper were the top of your head stops.

Step 2: Using this measurement multiply it by 3 and that is how much ribbon you will need to cut off for your body piece. Your shoulder strap will be about 1/3rd of the original measurement.

79306FB3-BF84-4F06-BD1A-8B0A1E672DCB (1)

Step 3: Using two of the hoop earrings fasten both ends of the strap piece onto the body piece, fasten the bonds 1/3rd of the way on the ribbon reserved for the body.

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Step 4: Tie your ribbon into a “naughty knot” around you.  A video detailing how to this is outlined below.

You’re now complete!  Rock your lovely Bow lingerie as a sexy gift for  your significant other.  Have them open it.

xzibit

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